Thursday, February 24, 2011
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Boyfriends or Girl Friends; Who Should Dominate
Penning this write-up was a challenge to me at the inception. Why? Why not? Should I waste my ink on a query every Mulika, Chike and Wale has got an answer for? To the question above, the dudes would echo in base we of course and the babes would equally sing the same in ever sweet melancholies thus putting me in a dilemma, a Scylla and charybdis.. I am then thus; pitched to choose how to die, to be killed either by a monster with a hundred eyes or a whirlwind of which the fate of both are the same. I would have loved to sit this one out on the fence, but shall I be faulted if I side the ladies? Shall I be Mutallabed if I say that they should be allowed to dominate? Heres the case; enough is enough, we dudes ought to stop showing off our small selves like sey we too much, like sey dominance na our birth right. God made man first, then so what? Did he not create woman out of man being the raw material? Do you not know that woman is a pure and refined product form its ore?
The word man we all know stands for both MAN and woMAN. Do not call me a conspiracy theorist but have you ever considered the fact that God might have created woman before man? What if man, due to his build and strength had conspired ab-initio to rewrite history thereby terming woman the weaker vessels? I keep pondering and with these I still ask, should ladies not dominate in a relationship? Now I am talking about dominance, not partial but total dominance over everything; loyalty, respect, love, care, major excesses; gift giving, buying movie and show tickets, recharge cards, paying for hair dos, pedicure and manicure et al, paying for shopping sprees, eatery stake-outs, e.t.c, the list is endless. With great power comes great responsibility, of which in this case, being the cash cow is added to it. So ladies do you still think you should dominate? Then I suggest you all shave up your hair and glue them to your jaws and chin to show that you have a beard and now you are ready to dominate, now you are the man.
You have mans total respect and loyalty (as in, you are made his superior by all laws; in air, land, sea and water). You have the last word in every argument, your opinions are above his, and you enforce his kind of friends, his hair and beard style, you ban him from smoking or drinking alcohol just because you dont like it or you want to, but neglecting the fact that he finds pleasure, happiness and highness there. It becomes his duty to wash your clothes, panties, pantyhose, catapults. He may not do so at all times, but when required, he has got to, by force. Its his duty to go to the market, get the food stuffs and the food done. Its his duty to do the house chores. He makes sure your home is in good order whenever around. At times he leaves his own crib solely for this aim. And what of bedmatics? Aha, you thought Ill leave that out eh? I guess youll love to have him lie back and receive all the hammering and thonging. Once youre done, not caring if hes satisfied or not, you roll over and die until morning. While in other cases, you just kip throbbing none stop until he begs for mercy. My dear lovely ladies, this is just a case, but I wont be wrong to have stated it as the kind of dominance you all have in mind. Since you ladies are now superior, he will tend to agitate, revolt, engage in all manner of (man) gender equality bullshit, but yet his status remains the same, why? Like I said before, the woman had been made his senior by all powers beyond him.
But ladies, will I be hanged if I make some wide guesses or assumptions? That during your supreme reign of dominance, that you wont be man enough, pardon me, I meant woman enough to prove your mettle in the top priorities of your new status, the top responsibility of being the cash cow. That even as you dominate, as he goes to the market to procure food stuffs, groceries, domestics under your command, that he solely gets all these with his own cash. That even as you dominate, you still veto him into paying for hair your dos, and all manner of beauty treatments of which the reverse should be the case. That he still has to take you shopping, to fast food places and movie marathons. Take you partying in pubs, clubs, beaches and all manner of sprees and spending exigencies all with his money. That he still pays for your house rent or at least gives you part of it.but wait a minute.I thought you were the superior of the sexes, the dominant one?
What of the festivities? He takes care of them. And the Birthday? He takes care of his own and yours too even though thats your job. And then here comes the almighty St. Valentines day, you are still the superior, so its normal if you get him an expensive wristwatch, may be Chris Aire, with a 24c yellow or white gold chain and ring to match. Its also normal for you to get him a clean cut diamond stud, a Zara Tux with it, a Tom Ford stunner and a Nike Air- force one snickers 2010 edition to match. You shouldnt also forget that he has to be strong for you, so hell love it if you also get him a carton of any power horse; of course you know he burns lots of energy during Sunday-sports (sex).
Now allow me to be frank, I suppose you wont even get him any of these, rather youll buy him just a singlet and a boxer short and with your domination, still veto him into buying you boxes of chocolates, teddy bears as big and beautiful as the Taj mahal, Gucci, Prada or Louis Vouitton kits comprising of a bag, a wristwatch, a purse, a slipper, a pair of shoes, a necklace or chain, and of course a perfume all by the same designer, all to match. Lunch or dinner at Mc donalds, Tanties, TFC, Mr Biggs, e.t.c must not be left out as she will want to show everyone who cares that she is pon the game unless you dont want the lem indoors. And finally after all this madness and anarchy, the dude will go to his friends and boast; ol boi, no see this boxers and singlet wey my Barbie by for meand then hell lie.imagine, she even bought me a perfume. Ill stop here because I believe that by now, you are all asking for my head, but I will ask and beg you to excuse or pardon me if have spoken amiss, for my will is good and still yet the question remains thus, this; BOYFRIENDS OR GIRLFRIENDS, WHO SHOULD DOMINATE?
The word man we all know stands for both MAN and woMAN. Do not call me a conspiracy theorist but have you ever considered the fact that God might have created woman before man? What if man, due to his build and strength had conspired ab-initio to rewrite history thereby terming woman the weaker vessels? I keep pondering and with these I still ask, should ladies not dominate in a relationship? Now I am talking about dominance, not partial but total dominance over everything; loyalty, respect, love, care, major excesses; gift giving, buying movie and show tickets, recharge cards, paying for hair dos, pedicure and manicure et al, paying for shopping sprees, eatery stake-outs, e.t.c, the list is endless. With great power comes great responsibility, of which in this case, being the cash cow is added to it. So ladies do you still think you should dominate? Then I suggest you all shave up your hair and glue them to your jaws and chin to show that you have a beard and now you are ready to dominate, now you are the man.
You have mans total respect and loyalty (as in, you are made his superior by all laws; in air, land, sea and water). You have the last word in every argument, your opinions are above his, and you enforce his kind of friends, his hair and beard style, you ban him from smoking or drinking alcohol just because you dont like it or you want to, but neglecting the fact that he finds pleasure, happiness and highness there. It becomes his duty to wash your clothes, panties, pantyhose, catapults. He may not do so at all times, but when required, he has got to, by force. Its his duty to go to the market, get the food stuffs and the food done. Its his duty to do the house chores. He makes sure your home is in good order whenever around. At times he leaves his own crib solely for this aim. And what of bedmatics? Aha, you thought Ill leave that out eh? I guess youll love to have him lie back and receive all the hammering and thonging. Once youre done, not caring if hes satisfied or not, you roll over and die until morning. While in other cases, you just kip throbbing none stop until he begs for mercy. My dear lovely ladies, this is just a case, but I wont be wrong to have stated it as the kind of dominance you all have in mind. Since you ladies are now superior, he will tend to agitate, revolt, engage in all manner of (man) gender equality bullshit, but yet his status remains the same, why? Like I said before, the woman had been made his senior by all powers beyond him.
But ladies, will I be hanged if I make some wide guesses or assumptions? That during your supreme reign of dominance, that you wont be man enough, pardon me, I meant woman enough to prove your mettle in the top priorities of your new status, the top responsibility of being the cash cow. That even as you dominate, as he goes to the market to procure food stuffs, groceries, domestics under your command, that he solely gets all these with his own cash. That even as you dominate, you still veto him into paying for hair your dos, and all manner of beauty treatments of which the reverse should be the case. That he still has to take you shopping, to fast food places and movie marathons. Take you partying in pubs, clubs, beaches and all manner of sprees and spending exigencies all with his money. That he still pays for your house rent or at least gives you part of it.but wait a minute.I thought you were the superior of the sexes, the dominant one?
What of the festivities? He takes care of them. And the Birthday? He takes care of his own and yours too even though thats your job. And then here comes the almighty St. Valentines day, you are still the superior, so its normal if you get him an expensive wristwatch, may be Chris Aire, with a 24c yellow or white gold chain and ring to match. Its also normal for you to get him a clean cut diamond stud, a Zara Tux with it, a Tom Ford stunner and a Nike Air- force one snickers 2010 edition to match. You shouldnt also forget that he has to be strong for you, so hell love it if you also get him a carton of any power horse; of course you know he burns lots of energy during Sunday-sports (sex).
Now allow me to be frank, I suppose you wont even get him any of these, rather youll buy him just a singlet and a boxer short and with your domination, still veto him into buying you boxes of chocolates, teddy bears as big and beautiful as the Taj mahal, Gucci, Prada or Louis Vouitton kits comprising of a bag, a wristwatch, a purse, a slipper, a pair of shoes, a necklace or chain, and of course a perfume all by the same designer, all to match. Lunch or dinner at Mc donalds, Tanties, TFC, Mr Biggs, e.t.c must not be left out as she will want to show everyone who cares that she is pon the game unless you dont want the lem indoors. And finally after all this madness and anarchy, the dude will go to his friends and boast; ol boi, no see this boxers and singlet wey my Barbie by for meand then hell lie.imagine, she even bought me a perfume. Ill stop here because I believe that by now, you are all asking for my head, but I will ask and beg you to excuse or pardon me if have spoken amiss, for my will is good and still yet the question remains thus, this; BOYFRIENDS OR GIRLFRIENDS, WHO SHOULD DOMINATE?
By Blaise Aboh
How to Mend a Broken Heart
You were once in a blissful relationship, like the kind you see in the movies, a wonderful experience of the two of you visitng exotic places, taking a walk by the beach side, going to see movies together, springing up surprises for each other. Your relationship would have been described as the best of the best relationships ever. You have dated and courted for one year now, she seems so much like a sister and a close friend, it's so rosy and then one day her employer calls her up, she has to relocate to somewhere far from you. Now you can only see her on weekends as your job would not permit you during the week, for the first one month the relationship seems to be intact, thanks to mobile phones and internet, you call her three times in a day, you chat her up on facebook, you send pictures to make her keep having a feel of you. The feeling is still there.
One afternoon she calls you up and tells you she is missing you so much and can't out up with the fact that you are far away from her, you try to encourage her to be strong for the relitonship, you bring to her notice how long you have dated and maintained the relationship, everything seems good again. She calls you up the next day and tells you bluntly that she is tired of the relationship and you ask why? She starts crying and says she just can't go on, upon persuasion she tells you she is dating someone else. It's like a big bang to your head, you begin to wonder "what have I done?" She says nothing, you are a perfect guy but it just can't work anymore. You become devastated, your body begins to shake and your voice quivers on phone, it seems like your head is spinning and you can' think straight and then she says "I am sorry" and your hear the beep; she drops the phone.You try to call her back but she refuses topic up her phone, now you say to yourself what the heck is wrong with this girl. She is gone and there is nothing you can do about it.
I know how painful it is to end a relationship just like that but you have to move on, most women are like, they don't consider the number of years you have dated or the times you have spent together, when they want out they just move on. You have to readjust and here are some tips to help you.
1. Acknowledge the fact that life is like that, people come and they go: You should not brood over a relationship for so long, the fact that you are a human being is understandable but naturally people are born everyday and people die everyday, when they die life continues no matter how long you cry they will never come back. Not every relationship ends up the way we want it but if it so happens that you need to go your seperate ways you take it like that. These days even daughters abscond from their parents homes, how painful not to talk about a lady leaving you just a guy she met somewhere. If you bear this fact on your mind then you can cope.
2. Hang out with your male friends: Your men would for ever be your men. Have you ever heard of a man breaking a man's heart?Well I am not talking about gay men here. Your buddies can never break your heart, they are the best you can hang out with - if you got good friends. You can go to the pool, play billiard, watch football, drink but don't do this because you are heart broken, joke and have fun. Really this really helps, before you know it you are letting go. Life is all about being happy so why should you be sad about a lady that left you when there are millions out there.
3. Join a group: You can make new friends by joining a group either in your church or a social group where you can mingle especially with singles. It helps you as you are going to engage your brain in other activities.
4. Write a book: You can pour out your frustration on a piece of paper, don't be surprised before you finish your story you might be on the 100th page. It helps to free your mind.
5. Don't discuss your broke relationship with every Tom, Dick and Harry: Yes the relationship is broken, most people might know but don't bad mouth her. You can talk about it with your close pals but not all of them, talking about the broken relationship would keep reminding you of the past times.
6. Don't jump into another relationship: Some people would naturally start dating someone else almost immediately after a heart break, this is not advicable, you should allow for some time before going into another relationship. Don't rush it, it would come naturally.
While this articles was written for men, women cannot also benefit from it by turning it the other way round. i.e Use women for men and men for women.
Wish you the best.
How to Be Close Friend With a Married Woman
There is no big deal being friends or even dating a married woman so far your intent is non sexual. Friendships and relationships strive on understanding of the two parties and also maturity plays a vital role in this kind of relationship. Marriage is a sacred union between a man and a woman and anyone who put assunder is bound to be doomed. The intent of this article is not to teach you to have sex with a married woman or snatch her from her husband; but its just a guide to having a platonic relationship with a married woman. So here goes; someone might say "why being close to a married woman when there are millions of young single ladies out there to be dated and to have a relationship with?" Yes why this question might be logical but you would bear with me that there are people you naturally like or just blend with whether they are married or not, it's just chemistry and nature.
Now I have to warn at this point that if you have to be friends with a married woman you should be very careful. Below are some tips on how to go about this kind of relationship:
1. Make her realise that you like her not for any sexual reasons: I advise to be careful with your choice of words, when talking to her don't be flirty, keep it real and natural. You need to make her understand that you respect the fact that she is married and you just need to be friends with her. If she likes you naturally then it's a plus for you.
2. Be careful with the phone calls: Common sense should tell you when to call a married woman or not; unless she does the calling at this period, then do not call. If she is the regular 8am - 4pm worker, you can send her a text during this period and if she is disposed she can text back or call. Please do not call her from 7pm upwards, you should know that she could be having a happy time with her family. Weekend calls should be avoided unless she opens up communication with you and wants to see you, please do not jeopardize her marriage.
3. Make her family your friend: Yes while this might sound a little awkward but it helps build the relationship. We all know that most men are possessive about their wives; if she introduces you to her husband and you sound and act withdrawn and he ever has a slight feeling of you trying to have an affair with his wife, then the friendship is done for. Instead when you meet her husband be jovial and free, if she got kids better for you - just play with them and make them your friends. If they call you Uncle "good thing". Some ice cream would do though. With these you have got a ticket to the family
4. Erase every erotic thoughts: I am sure you know what adultery is? I am not about advising you to have sex with a married woman as you would be subject to eternal damnation. Secondly if you lure her and finally have sex with her, chances are she would hate you later on when she realises you were a sly fox who just wanted to get her laid. While some married women my enjoy having sex with another man, I don't advise that because it spoils a lot of thing. You should ask yourself how you would feel when you find out that another man slept with your wife.
5. Be careful with the show of emotions: When giving her gifts please do this with care. Do not give a gift that depicts intimacy. This would mean getting her to think wide, most women are touchy people so you should not make her feel you have plans other than just being friends
6. Keep the relationship plain and simple: Yes you can joke with her, tell her about the ladies you have met, the things you have done, the places you have been, you can talk almost about anything but be careful with sex talks. There are so many things to discuss, just get her interest and center your discussion on what she likes to talk most.
I know you might be wondering, why all these rules if I really want to be friends with a married woman. Yes this is what works for me as I have some married friends and I don't over step the bounds. Like I earlier on said marriage is sacred so do not be the devil who will destroy a life long union. This is just the simple truth if you want to be friends with a married woman.
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Popular Online Dating Activities For Men
Heads up, gents. Online dating can open up new doors of opportunities with a little help from real world dating tips that work. Spice up your matchmaking with some of these ideas.
Looks Count
Comment on how attractive she is. Yes, women do want to know they are pretty, even if they’re online and you can’t see them and have no idea. So in your communications, ask questions that would help you know, but in an unobtrusive way like – how do you wear your hair? And then say how attractive that must look.
Comment on how attractive she is. Yes, women do want to know they are pretty, even if they’re online and you can’t see them and have no idea. So in your communications, ask questions that would help you know, but in an unobtrusive way like – how do you wear your hair? And then say how attractive that must look.
Kindness Counts
Point out nice things or the lemonade in life – nice things the other person has mentioned, nice acts the person has done, good things on the news latterly, etc. Be upbeat, and forget those lemons in life. Even in email a person can shout, by using all capital letters. So show manners and kindness. Keep swearing, unkind remarks, prejudice, etc. out of your communications. And “do unto others….”
Point out nice things or the lemonade in life – nice things the other person has mentioned, nice acts the person has done, good things on the news latterly, etc. Be upbeat, and forget those lemons in life. Even in email a person can shout, by using all capital letters. So show manners and kindness. Keep swearing, unkind remarks, prejudice, etc. out of your communications. And “do unto others….”
So add some helpful real-world tips that do work (a lot of the time anyway) into your online dating equations. And come up on the positive side of romance – and enjoy more lemonade!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)